40 Moms 40 Weeks – God gives honor to the shamed.
Mom: Tamar
Children: Perez, Zerah
Gospel Connection:
God exposes and shames the wicked, honors the righteous, and protects the vulnerable.
Ice Breaker Question
Why is it good to have a son? What can sons do for you?
Bible Reading: Genesis 38:1-30
Summary
Tamar’s story interrupts the story of Joseph in Egypt and gives us a picture of Judah, father of Perez and ancestor to King David and King Jesus. In the next chapter, Joseph is shown to be a pure and honest man, but in this story, Joseph’s older brother Judah is selfish and terrible to Tamar. Tamar’s story shows us how badly women were treated and taken advantage of, but also shows us how God uses suffering to bless us and to carry out His plan. Without a husband or a son, Tamar would have had no protection or way to care for herself. Judah was selfish, denying Tamar the protection she needed and then using her for his own gratification. Later, he was a hypocrite, demanding she be burned alive for getting pregnant before being married, even though he was willing to visit a prostitute. God revealed the truth, took away Tamar’s shame, and showed her to be more righteous than Judah. This was the beginning of Judah’s repentance and faith and Tamar is included in the genealogy of Jesus.
Question led Discussion
1. God often includes harsh and uncomfortable stories in the Bible. Do you think this helps us with our lives that can be harsh and uncomfortable?
Give opportunity for discussion
2. In their culture, it seemed to be okay for Judah to visit a prostitute, but shameful for Tamar to be pregnant before she was married. Do you see a different standard for boys and girls in our culture today?
There may be a different standard in our culture and that can seem unfair. Of course, the solution is not to lower the standard for girls, but to hold boys and men to God’s standard. God’s standard is the same for everyone. Sex outside of the marriage covenant is forbidden because it is harmful to the person. God wants us to enjoy beautiful sex that He created for us to grow intimate with our spouse and to produce children. He knows that there is danger with having sex with many partners including disease and emotional pain. We should honor God by having sex only with our spouses.
3. Tamar waited patiently and obediently for Judah to provide her a husband. What is the longest you’ve had to wait for something you needed?
Give opportunity for discussion
4. Do you think women are still vulnerable today? How can other women, the men in our lives, and the church help protect women?
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5. Onan was selfish and would not provide Tamar with a child. God struck Onan dead for his selfishness. How do you deal with your children when they are selfish?
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6. Tamar’s son Perez brought her a form of salvation because she would now be cared for by Judah. Jesus can be called a son of Tamar as well. How is His salvation different?
Having a son gave Tamar some protection and comfort in her earthly life and that is good. However, she would still grow old and die. She would still have sickness and pain and suffering. She would still be hungry and sad. Worst of all, she was still a sinner and the wrath of God awaited her at her death. Jesus is the perfect Savior who offers us perfect, painless, eternal life. Even better, that eternal life is spent with Him because His obedience and sacrifice satisfies the righteous wrath of God and makes us sons and daughters through faith and repentance.
7. How can we be kind to girls who are pregnant and not married, but at the same time tell them about God’s plan for sex and marriage?
Give opportunity for discussion
8. Tamar had a difficult life. She had two husbands die and was afraid she would never have a family. But, God used her suffering for her good, for our good, and for His glory. How can we glorify God in our suffering?
Give opportunity for discussion